May 2010
8 posts
Next Stop: Graduation Station
Why hello there Lexers. Tonight is the eve of most of our first graduations (unless you’re an alumni, which puts you one year older on the academic calendar). As we prepare to march on down those red bricks towards Lee chapel hoping that we won’t sweat out of whatever hair product we’re using, I can’t help but wonder what’s next. And it was when a friend of mine were talking about the next step...
Bejeweled, Bewitched, Bewildered
Why Hello there you Stay-Up-Laters. So it was just the other morning when a friend of mine and I were up late, watching trashy infomercials on TBN when one came on encouraging people to bedazzle their nether parts. According to a testimonial I read online later, 22% of women find it acceptable to va-jazzle… the lady version of be-jeweling. (in case you were wondering, the male version is to...
One Size Fits All
Why hello there Lexers. A week to go and yet everything still seems the same. Same pressure to pass, same parties happening, same everything. Well, Lexers, it was just the other day that a few friends of mine and I were talking size and we realized… there really should be a “do not fly” list on campus. Why? So that you don’t cake it hard core with someone only to unzip those “Lucky You” jeans only...
Lexington Blind Item: Private Dancer
Hello Lexers. How about a little hump day treat? Try to keep up… this one is a doozy. So the question is what graduating senior had relations with a 37 year old dancer from Roanoke? We’re all about turning Lex into Cougar Town so we’re not going to call foul on the play just yet. In fact, we didn’t consider this a remarkable fete until we learned about her family lineage. That’s right ladies and...
Ring Ring
Why hello there Lexers. A couple of friends of mine and I came up with a theory over afternoon beer the other day. You can tell the kind of person you want based on your cell phone preferences.
Think about it. If you’re looking for an all business all the time corporate type, you most likely have a black berry. If you’re into someone who’s more fun, laid back but could crack on you… iPhone...
Lexington Q&A
Why hello there Lexers. Before you go off and enjoy your weekends, I thought I’d address a couple of the questions that have been building up in the LATC mailbox. Here goes.
How do you feel about W&L being named the frattiest school in the country?
You know, let’s discuss this for a second. This school asked the Princeton Review to take us off of their list because we were #1 for...
Weekend To-Do List
Phi Psi Cockfight: There’s nothing like seeing a bunch of dicks dudes beat the crap out of each other. No matter who gets hurt here, those watching always win.
Arrested Development
Why hello there, Lexers. Sorry for the long hiatus. I’m going to be honest for a second— and for once— I was thinking about how I would let the blog go upon graduation. Would I give it away? Train someone? Phase it out? Then I thought… I’ll just quit. Cold turkey… like a crack head arrested on his third offense and sent to the pen. Done. And then something so...
April 2010
2 posts
Lexington Blind Item: A Late Night Snack
Why hello you stay-up laters. Here at Lex and the City, we can’t resist a good all-nighter or two, especially when we’re treated to some truly spectacular anonymous tips. So here’s the question, Lexers. Which faculty member’s midnight caller has the vanity plates KA-1? I wish I could tell you, Lexers, but the fact of the matter is, who adults let sleep over is their...
“I’m too sunburned to wear a bra.”
– Overheard on the way to the Coop. Thanks for the over-share sweetie. And in related news, we hear there’s a sale of Aloe Vera at the CVS.
A Q&A: Bucket Lists and Spring Terms
Why Hello there, Lexers. I have to confess: my desperate attempt to graduate on time has left LATC on the backburner. And although the B in Markheavens B. Tshuma Jr. now stands for Busy, I’m determined to stay abreast of the bubble’s comings and goings. Which is why I’m happy to offer a brand new Q&A session. Enjoy the hump day treat Lexers.
Q. LATC, reading the story about the streakers has...
March 2010
14 posts
Lexicon of the Week: GIFY
Definition: GIFY refers to someone who is “straight” now but will be Gay In Five Years.
Etymology: An acronym for Gay In Five Years.
Sentence: No worries, he’s a GIFY. Just give him a call when he comes out in five years.
Weekend To-Do List: Fancy Dress
Duh. This is about the only no-brainer weekend of the year… well minus Buffalo Creek, but it looks like that won’t be happening for a while… so yeah. Fancy Dress, this Saturday, is more than just a drunker version of prom. It’s more like prom on steroids, and I say that as a good thing. Who doesn’t enjoy dressing up, drinking cocktail after cocktail and hitting the...
A Lexington Blind Item
Hello Lexers. Here’s a little hump day treat for you. Which two professors happened upon a handful of students streaking the Colonade in the wee hours of the morning this weekend? We here at Lex and the City think that a casual streak every now and again is not only appropriate, but also beneficial to your health. We also think its healthy for the faculty to get out more, so congrats to the...
Lex and the City: The Other Thing Is
Hello Lexers. There are very few things I enjoy more than spring time… that is until facilities management decides to pepper our campus with compost that makes the entire hill smell like the inside of a dirty toilet bowl. But alas, the warm weather, sunshine and excuse to wear flip flops still prevail and we here at LATC plan on soaking in every ounce of our last Virginia spring.
And it was when...
Local Politics
Hello there Lexers. I hope everyone had a great weekend. Here at Lex and the City, we don’t usually pay too much attention to politics, especially of the local variety. In fact the closest I’ve ever even come to being “political” was when I ordered two dozen lime green shirts for the Hawaii mock con delegation. But alas, with tomorrow’s EC and SJC elections coming up,...
Weekend To-Do List: Down Under
Sure Fire Stop: Why hello there Lexers. For three years, I’ve been trying to finagle my way into as many formals as possible. After some crafty wheeling and dealing, my calling card to Kappa’s infamous Down Under was finally filled. This Saturday I will be joining those lovely ladies for what I only hope lives up to the legendary stories. Why as just a wee freshman, I remember the...
A Lexington Love Letter
Dear KEWL,
I’m all about a healthy public awareness campaign, I really am. Ask S.E.A.L. Just last term, I helped further their cause by dumping some of my own trash into the heap that, from an aerial view, looked like a giant zit on campus. And while I have no major problem with Love Your Body Week, and I think that the giant painted caslopus that stands behind Robinson is an artistic...
This Just In
Alright Lexers, so I’m halfway through writing this week’s LATC when I get an anonymous tip that turns my stomach in such a way that it must be physically impossible. It appears, Lexers, that the third time is the charm. A poopy bandit has struck again, this time in no other place than Srat bridge. Why? I ask you Pooper ThreeDux. Why? What is the point of such an action, for crying out...
Lexicon of the Week: JailBait
Definition: Jailbait is a noun, referring to someone or something that could land you in jail. Usually used to describe someone under the age of consent.
Etymology: The root word Jail, meaning prison compounded with the root word bait, meaning to attract or sexually entice.
Sentence: It doesn’t matter how many of them end up drunk at your Tequila Shot Party across the street from campus, I...
You Like Beef?
Now ladies and gentleman, you know we here at LATC are always up for supporting a good cause, which is why we’d like to refer you Jordy Stern’s campus notice circa March 9, 2010. In that post, you will find an expose on the reasons to support local grass fed beef. Having just watched Food Inc. myself— while eating some locally grown Taco Bell I might add— we can’t...
Lex and the City: A Letter of Reccomendation
Why hello there Lexers. Looking outside, it seems as though the sun has finally smiled on our little campus and is melting away what’s remained of the everlasting snow. Hopefully this weather sticks so that in a couple of weeks, we can officially open up the tubing season with style!
So it was when a friend of mine and I were filling out internship and job applications over LexCof’s flavored...
Lexington Q&A
Why Hello there Lexers. I hope everyone is having a stellar week. Things have been a little crazy here at the LATC office, but as things slow down and near towards graduation, we’re sure everything will fall into place. With that said, there are a few burning questions that people want answered so here goes (and if you’re question didn’t make the cut, you always send on in here)
...
Welcome Back.
Why hello there Lexers. I know, I know. Long time no see, but even the best of the best take brief hiatuses for some rest and recreation, and here at LATC, we make no apologies for taking the week off. Instead, we say welcome back to the land of endless snow and a hibernating Provost. To kick off the remainder of the term, Lexers, I can’t be happier to announce some big changes to come to LATC in...
February 2010
11 posts
Lexicon of the Week: Scramble
Definition: To scramble is to lay as much seed as possible in a short amount of time. Usually associated with Senior Scrambling, as seniors tend to scramble around campus in their final months. Laying seed.
Etymology: Comes from the colloquial American term scram, meaning to “shake up.”
Sentence: I can’t believe graduation is in 99 days. I’d better get on the ball and...
Weekend To-Do List
Hello Lexers. There is absolutely no question about what is on the to-do list this weekend: it’s Valentine’s Day, of course. Now I know that all the pink and red used to gross people who weren’t in relationships out, but that was before we grew up and turned 21. This is one of the rare holidays when being in a relationship is actually a detriment to your enjoyment of the...
A Lexington Q&A
So, Lexers, some of you actually took my offer seriously and sent me some pretty serious questions. I’m happy to oblige below with a couple of my favorites and a few thoughts. If you’re slow on the uptake, send in your best relationship or non-relationship related questions and I will attempt to use my expertise to answer what it is that is concerning you Lexers.
Question: Northface or...
A Lexington Late Night Snack
Why hello there Lexers. Normally we’d wait until morning to make this post, as we here at Lex and the City believe in a good night’s sleep (You can’t ever be too rested for that drive to DC and Green Card meeting, right S. Bullitt?) however a very serious report has come to our attention. Allegedly, Lexers, there is a “significant” number of new herpes cases roaming around campus and we simply...
Lex and the City: The Beginning of the End
Why hello there, Lexers. I trust everyone is well rested after a snowed in weekend and is looking forward to a great week. We here in the LATC offices couldn’t be happier about being able to walk down the sidewalk without slipping and falling anymore. Thanks so much facilities management for your diligent work in what I’m calling “The Great Snow Storm that Was-ish.”
So it was when a friend and I...
Lexicon of the Week: DT_ List
Definition: DT_, as in Down To Blank, refers to everything someone is willing to do, usually in a sexual context. The sexual act one is willing to do makes up the third letter of the phrase. One can be DTF, DTA, or DTS just to name a few.
Etymology: Down To is taken directly from ebonics meaning “willing to” or often “would like to.” Down To was then shortened to simply DT...
Public Service
Hello Lexers. As a member of the Rockbridge Area Journalist Society, its our public duty to inform you that the school will shut down at noon today. Yes, Lexers, after much haranguing, Provost Aprille has finally softened her heart stocked up on 4 AA batteries and a travel size baby lotion and cancelled classes. This free day gift from the heavens, as well as the icy road conditions and general...
Weekend To-Do List: Superbowl
Hi there Lexers. This is one of those rare weekends when we’re looking forward to Sunday just as much as we’re looking forward to Friday evening happy hour. Why? The Superbowl. To be honest, we here at Lex and the City could care less who’s playing (although for the record, we’re putting out money on the Saints) because this sporting event is about more than just tossing...
A Lexington Blind Item
Hello, Lexers. We knew the administration was cracking down on crack underage drinking, and probably for good reason, but we didn’t expect things to go this far. In the past week, two Srats have been taken down for alleged tear night behaviors and they both share something common: both sororities receiving sternly worded reprimands from Teri Cugliari and Co are finding themselves in the...
A W&L Q&A
We here at LATC are constantly looking for ways to enhance your Lexington experience. It’s for this reason that we’ve taken our relationship expertise and applied to a number of semi-relationship related questions. Feel free to submit your own here or via facebook or email and check back every Tuesday to see if your questions have been answered. To get you started, below is the best question I...
Lex and the City: Bump, Set-Up, Spike
Why hello there Lexers. I trust everyone had a fun and eventful week. Here at Lex and the City, we spent our time divided between mopping up our home and travelling to neighboring cities. There’s nothing like coming home from an out of town visit to find yourself ankle deep in frat sludge caused by sophomoric drunken stupidity. We’re also still surprised that Snow Storm 2010 is still causing waves...
January 2010
13 posts
Weekend To-Do List
Why Hello Lexers. While some will spend the weekend skiing, playing real life Grand Theft Auto or hoping their names don’t appear on a list I hear is being shopped to Lex Po, the rest of us will be taking up for charity. That’s right, Ladies and Gentleman, this weekend is the much anticipated Lipsync competition, a loosely veiled public service event than is most enjoyed under the...
Lex and the City: Don't Ask, Don't Tell
Hello, Lexers. Happy Monday. We here at Lex and the City hear it was an eventful weekend for some and to that we say good job everyone. We would love more than anything to discuss the snow-covered elephant in the room, but we’re a relationship columnist and that is all that we do. Discuss relationships. So we’ll stick with the blowing we know and leave the rest to the proper authorities.
So...
Lexicon of the Week: WUM
Pronunciation: Rhymes with come.
Definition: Refers to a surprisingly large group of people (most likely Mormons, prudes and closet homosexuals too nervous to alert their girlfriends people with solid morals) who are saving themselves until they find the one they love. Does not include born again virgins. Often cited for doing all kinds of sexual acts short of the sexual act.
Etymology: Acronym...
A Lexington Late Night Snack
Here at Lex and the City we’d love to be talking about the very substantial alleged bust this weekend, but our forte is strictly in relationships and we’d rather stick with what we know. We’ll leave the heavy journalistic lifting to the Ring Tum Cry- every time I read it (although, it IS times like these, when the powder covered hills of Windfall are all a flutter, that we still...
Lexicon of the Week: Pre-Cheat
Definition: Pre-Cheat-The act of scoping out, caking, or flirting with someone you’re not dating once the quality of your relationship starts to decline. Sometimes referred to as dating insurance.
Etymology: Pre, from the Greek root word meaning before. Cheat, referring to swindling or fooling.
Sentence: That fugly Thunder-C has been pre-cheating on me for weeks. She could have at least...
Lexington Blind Item: Love Triangles
We here at Lex and the City aren’t ones to gossip, but every once in a while a story so grand comes across our desk that we can’t keep it to ourselves. On this day, Lexers, we’ve heard two such steamy stories. So what double dose of love triangle is going around campus like the Swine Flu on a sweaty dance floor? Although we’ve been sworn to secrecy on both isolated...
Lex and the City: Fishers of Men
Hello Lexers. Here at LATC, we’re having mixed feelings about entering our final term here in the bubble. The feelings aren’t mixed merely because the future is uncertain (insert your own “in this economic downturn” sentence here) but mostly because we’re trying to soak up all of the fun, events and opportunities before we’re given the boot from the hill and have to happen upon the real world of...
Lexicon of the Week: Cock Block
Definition: The verb cock block refers to a move employed by trained male chicken fighters, also known as cocks. When these fighters attack in pairs, one usually remains behind to distract or thwart the competition.
Etymology: From the latin word Cock, which means to rise first, as in the morning. In most societies, the cock rises with the sun and stays up until further notice, crowing loudly...
Lex and the City: Rinse and Repeat
I normally spend Mondays writing the relationship advice that has made Lex and the City so credible and influential for the past three years. Recent events, however, have forced me to table the next LATC article until tomorrow so that today I can address a very serious matter. The pooper has struck again, people. Not the same pooper, I’m hoping (although that part of the investigation is...
Lexington Blind Item
What W&L Sophomore is throwing her hat back into the rush rink this week, after almost being initiated at one house last year and now setting her sights on another? Our sources here at Lex and the City confirm that someone is hoping the second time is the charm and that the result will be a little bit more to her liking. Here at LATC we’ve always applauded brazen displays of audicity as...
Weekend To-Do List: Tear Night
Tear Night: There truly isn’t a night quite like this on any campus anywhere in the world. This is the night that Alcohol EDU warns you about when you are still a pre-freshman. This is the night that makes the administration cringe, and no matter how hard they try to curb student drinking at W&L, I sincerely hope that they’ve resigned themselves to the fact that Tear Night will be...
A Note on Rush
Dear Freshman Girls,
As approximately 89% of you embark on the institutionalized torture time tested tradition that is Formal Rush, we here at Lex and the City would like to give you our biggest good luck. Although I’m sure everything your Dorm Counselors, Rho Gammas, Teri Cugliari have told you is completely accurate, the fact of the matter is, this exciting time is also a very stressful time....
Welcome Back
Welcome back Lexers. And welcome to 2010. We here at LATC couldn’t be happier to be back in the land of the North Face, red brick and lemon squares galore. Not only did we spend break looking forward to coming back, but also not looking forward to what’s coming in just a few months. Ladies and gentleman, graduation is just around the corner, and as I prepare for my last matriculation tomorrow, I...
December 2009
12 posts
Lex and the City: Merry Christmas
We here at Lex and the City couldn’t let this glorious day pass without giving you all a wonderful little Christmas gift. So here it is… the answer to the Lexington Blind Item two weeks ago (click here to refresh those gin soaked memories).
So which faculty member is ALLEGEDLY accepting the prize for biggest scandal 2010? If you’re expecting a name and tawdry details, I’m...
Lex and the City: The Office
Hello Lexers. I hope everyone is having a happy happy holiday. (In the war between Holidays and Christmas, I’m going with Holidays. I’m not trying to be accused of ethnic insensitivity.) And alas, I was going to take some time off and come back in January with a strong last term worth of relationship advice. However, it was when my friend and I realized that in 6 short months, we’d be (fingers...